Too many memos

Getting wierder

2006-09-26T17:21:00.000+01:00

The birds are still there - they were waiting for me when I left for work this morning and were still there when I got home just now.

I think that they are sizing me up to work out how many of them it will take to carry me away!

Don't look up

2006-09-25T16:44:00.000+01:00

I think I've just stepped out of real life and into a film

It's all gone a bit Hitchcock here

As I got out of my car just now hundreds and I really mean hundreds of starlings flew over me and settled into the tree opposite my car. Then as I shut the car doors they flew over me again and are now roosting on my roof. If I'd raised my hand while they flew over, they would have hit me.

They're still there, watching, waiting for me.

I never before thought I looked like Tippi Hedren, but maybe I do!

Needed a break

2006-09-17T11:49:00.000+01:00

I haven't written here since June but I have sat down lots of times to write and then just not been able to.

I hadn't realised just how much the loss of my dad would impact on me - my outlook on life has changed and I can't see the point in working myself as hard as I used to when you never know when life will be taken from you or your ability to do the things you want will be taken away.

I'm seriously considering a change of career or to look at cutting back on my responsibilities at school - I need to get more time for just me.

I used to work for hours outside of school and usually the summer break would see me doing lots of school stuff, but this year I didn't start doing any school stuff until two days ago and I haven't spent more than 2.5 hours in school, wheras normally I'd be there for days.

I did feel guilty that other people were doing the jobs I'd normally do, but I just didn't care!

As a family, we're adapting more to dad not being here and are starting to think about memorial stones and so on. Mum's definitely showing how strong she is and I've really enjoyed the fact that I went and stayed with her for a week and then she spent a week wth me - we both needed to spend time away from home - we talked lots about the past and the future and it did us good.

Got a bit upset yesterday - I was sorting my dry cleaning out, suits ready for next week, and I decided that I needed to clean the suit i wore for dad's funeral. As I was checking the pockets, I came across some rose leaves that I'd put there because they'd fallen off of the rose I put in dad's grave - for that few seconds I was back at the funeral and that was quite upsetting.

I still have those leaves and now I wonder what to do with them.

It's now a couple of weeks since I wrote the above and I'm back in the swing of work although my attitude is still different from this time last year.

Week 3 starts tomorrow and i'm sort of looking forward to it - the teaching bit that is, the rest is just a chore. Anyway I'll try to write here a bit more regularly now.

Loss of enthusiasm and patience.

2006-06-29T21:27:00.000+01:00

I have no inclination to do anything at the moment - I've been meaning to update here for a few days but just couldn't be bothered to do it.

I'm going to work but only because I have to - I'm getting no pleasure from my work, not even with the classess that I used to look forward to teaching.

If I could stop going to work tomorrow, I would and wouldn't have any regrets.

I find pretty much everything to be be annoying - I have a short temper but lately it's even worse and some people have gotten the rough end when they didn't deserve it (some did though!).

Ironically what I most need to be doing now is keeping busy, because when I sit doing nothing I start to get upset - I know it's important to let myself grieve, but it's so painful.

Today's obsession is the fact that I can't remember what Dad's voice sounded like - at times I've almost got in my mind and then it slipped away. The same's happening with dreams, I know I've dreamed about Dad but when I wake the actual details are gone which is so frustrating.

At other times I'm numb, I just don't feel anything about anything and I feel guilty about that.

C's moved house now and she really wants me to visit but I just can't face company at present - I know that she won't care how I am but I can't get up the enthusiasm to do it or even to work out how to get to her new place.

Come tomorrow it'll be a month since Dad passed, it only seems like a couple of days ago - I can picture so clearly how I was holding his hand when he left us and then how I sat with him afterwards on my own for a while just talking to him.

I talk to Dad a lot during the day, when I'm at home there's always a photo nearby that I can chat to - that probably sounds nuts but so what.

I want my Dad back.

Some thoughts

2006-06-19T16:40:00.000+01:00

Since my dad passed away a couple of weeks ago I've really not seen the point in doing any thing.

Most of the time I manage to keep life ticking over, but sometimes it just seems pointless - my dad worked hard, never hurt anyone, was kind and gentle but in the end wasn't given any more than 59 years of life.

Anyone who's read this blog knows that I used to work a lot and my work was a major focus in my life, but at the moment I don't care about it at all - I go in and teach my classes but without much interest or enthusiasm.

I'm strong most of the time, but sometimes the stupidest of things can get me crying - a line in a song while I was driving home this evening had me crying for the rest of the trip - I can't remember the line now but it was enough.

I know that the wounds are still fresh and the fact that yesterday was Fathers' Day hasn't helped, but I can't get up the drive to care about anything at present except that I miss my dad.

I know that I should focus on the happy memories and the good times I had with dad, and most of the time I do - but I want there to have been more memories, more good times, more happiness, just more of him.

Upset again now, so I'm going to stop.

take care

Sad

2006-06-04T12:20:00.000+01:00

Dad,
I'm pleased that you're not in pain anymore, but I'm already missing you.
You can sleep now but one day we'll see each other again.

Sleep well.

Relieved and cooking up a storm

2006-05-28T12:48:00.000+01:00

Dad doesn't need the blood transfusion - he needs haemaglobin which he's getting today, but apparently he looks 100% better than yesterday. He had fluid on his lung which they've drained today and that seems to have helped.

Right now I'm cooking like a demon - I think I may have used most of the cooking equipment I own, every hob is busily doing something and the smells wafting around are yummy. The only hitch is that I don't own quite enough containers to freeze all this food ready to transport to dad tomorrow night - I guess I'll have to eat some for my dinner tonight.

Keep getting better dad.

Worried and disappointed.

2006-05-27T21:51:00.000+01:00

Mum and Dad aren't visiting after all.

Dad's been taken back into hospital - he needs another blood transfusion. He seems to spend more time in hospital these days than he does at home.

I was really looking forward to having them as my guests and taking care of them for a few days, but that's not going to happen now. Instead I'm going to cook all of the meals that Dad had asked for, freeze them and then take them up to him on Tuesday - hopefully he'll be home by then.

On the bright side, after all the preparations I made today, I have a really clean home now!

Get well soon Dad

Yay, No work

2006-05-27T13:37:00.000+01:00

We've got a week's holiday this week so I'm looking forward to a bit of a break, although there are a few bits and pieces of work I need to get done.

I'm looking forward to Mum and Dad visiting tomorrow and staying through the Bank Holiday - it's been ages since I've seen them, although I speak to them several times a week, it's not the same as seeing them.

Dad's been unwell again so I'm hoping he copes with the journey ok - it's only 3 hours but he gets overheated easily these days.

Spending my day tidying and cleaning so that I don't look like a complete slob and also so that Mum and dad have somewhere to sleep!

Just to prove that I can't get away from work totally, the boss e-mailed stuff to me this morning - how nice of him to take the time to do that on a Saturday morning!

Anyway, back to cleaning

Things I Hate

2006-05-21T12:33:00.000+01:00

Cleaning.
Junk Mail.
Having so many tasks to do that I can't do any of them well.
Arguments.
Disorder.
Noisy neighbours - especially the one upstairs who seems to be hammering randomly.
Driving.
Traffic.
Parking - a bit of a pattern developing there.
Creased shirts - no matter how carefully I iron, my shirts always develop a crease somewhere.
Ties with open collars and untucked shirt tails.
Socks that don't work with the trousers.
Not having a packet of mints in my pocket.
My Ipod running out of power at the wrong time.
Post-it notes and memo slips.
Slow computers.
Onion.
Beer.
Waiting in queues.
Pens that run out of ink just as you need them the most.
That my desk is full of rubbish that other people tell me is important.
E-mails from work.
Not having cash in my wallet - even though I have cards.
Having less than a half tank of fuel in my car.
The fact that the UK doesn't have lots of ski slopes (and snow, obviously).
How short the days are at the weekend compared to the week days.
Having loads of DVD's and not wanting to watch any of them.
Shaving.
Migraine.
That I still haven't got my shower fixed.
Ironing.
That I keep catching cold lately.
People who don't see the big picture.
Kids who stop other kids from enjoying their time in school.
Teachers who don't seem interested in their students.
People who put the school before the students.

There's plenty more but that'll do for now.

Oops!

2006-05-06T12:05:00.000+01:00

Well, the strain of my extra workload finally got the better of me.
I started the week still suffering with the tail end of a migraine and after simmering and seething for a few days , getting more and more tired as I had to work later and later to keep to deadlines, I finally snapped in a meeting with the boss this week and walked out on him.

The history to this is simple, as I said in my last post, I've taken on extra work because we're missing a man and I've had to do triple the usual work to keep on target and to make sure that things are delivered on time. Throughout this I've had not a word of support from the boss, in fact the only thing he's said is to keep me another task with a short deadline.

By wednesday this week I was exhausted and by the time I got to our leadership meeting in the afternoon I was short-tempered too. During the meeting I made two points and on both cases got slapped down in quite a rude manner - in fact the implication was that I was lying!

Thursday morning, another meeting, during the discussions I made a point about health and safety, what the boss was suggesting would be dangerous and I pointed out that to do what he wanted would be dumb since it would place students at risk. Anyway again I got slapped down and accused of calling the boss dumb - that was the final straw, I stormed out.

Yesterday I sent a note outlining all that I'd done during the absence of my colleague and what still needed to be done, but also what I couldn't do given my current workload. Within two minutes of delivering my note I was called to the boss's office and yelled at - I thought it was the content of the note that had upset him, but it turns out that he was upset because I'd addressed him as Mr ......... in the note - he was annoyed because I'd called him by name! What should I call him? Oh wait I can think of several other names!

Next week's going to be fun, the boss is due to watch me teach on monday - I wonder how fair and objective he'll be! Also other tasks he's given me are due and I haven't finished and probably won't be able to finish them on time.

I also think I've another migraine coming on - time to pop the little pink and yellow pills again.

The main thing that hampers my progress is the fact that we only have 24 hours in a day, if only there were 30!

Anyway whinge over, I've brought work home, but I'm not going to do it today, I'm going out with C - shopping then dinner then a movie - probably Mission Impossible 3 that C wants to see, I didn't even know it was out.

Tomorrow I might work or I might not - I'm going to be scolded anyway so I might as well have one big scolding rather than several smaller ones!

Right, time to shop - I'm thinking about buying a rock tumbler, it's useful in cleaning up the silver I'm working with.

Catching Up

2006-04-29T15:37:00.000+01:00

It's been a busy couple of weeks - I'm a man down in my department at school so I've had to take on his work too, in some areas this has tripled my workload. To make it worse it's my busiest season so I was already working flat out, but who needs to eat and sleep anyway!

As ever the boss is being demanding and seems unable to recognise that we're doing our best - he still doesn't seem to trust us and is continually scolding us and chasing us to do our work, he doesn't seem to realise that he'd get more from us if he just trusted us more.

My dad's gone through a rough patch with his illness, but now seems to be getting a little better - the cocktail of drugs he was on seemed to be clashing and now that some have been removed he seems to be making progress.

It seems like it was months ago that I was happily playing in the snow in Canada - I want to be there again!

I have made time to make some more jewellery - my obsession with my little figures continues, but now I'm working on making them in silver - I'm only making bracelets at the minute , but I want to try making a ring - I just can't decide on a design. The photos here show what I've made lately.

Of course, I should also find something to do with what I've made, otherwise I'll end up surrounded with the things - there's a limit to how many times I can use them as gifts!

Anyway, that'll do for now - I've more errands to run.

Out of practice

2006-04-26T23:54:00.000+01:00

Haven't posted in a while and too tired to do so properly now

Goal for this weekend - post to blog

Still Jet Laggy

2006-04-16T06:18:00.000+01:00

Been awake since 4am - watched lots of educational tv and done laundry.

Hope I can get my body clock back before work on Tuesday.

This is the earliest I've been awake on a Sunday - shame nowhere's open, I feel like shopping!

What time is it?

2006-04-15T20:35:00.000+01:00

Well I'm still having trouble with the jet lag - I was up and doing school paperwork before 7am this morning and then sleeping at 1pm.

Anyway, it's time to write about my trip.

I had a great time - I didn't ski as many challenging runs as I would normally do, I was with C and she can't ski the tougher runs and I hate to ski alone so we went at her pace.

There was plenty of snow and plenty of sun which is a good balance, although there was some rain and quite a lot of heavy cloud - the last day skiing was cut short cos we couldn't see more than twenty feet in front of us which is a little dangerous.

After eight years, I reached a goal I'd been promising myself - I took a day to learn how to snowboard. it was great fun and I'm glad I did it but if I do it again I'll do it different. The instructor went too quickly, trying to put too much into the day and this meant that we spent a lot of time falling and getting annoyed - I gained my first snow-related injuries in about 7 years, I have a sprained thumb and a sore back, the thumb was from falling off of a chair lift and the sore back was from C ploughing into me when I was on the ground and my back took the full force of her weight through the edge of her board. I want to try it again cos I couldn't do it and I like a challenge - perhaps several short lessons rather than one long one.

I did feel guilty for cheating on my skis with a snowboard, but we've made up now!

Also went to my first ice hockey game (in fact my first professional sporting event) - that was fun too albeit confusing, I still don't understand all that went on other than the local team, the Calgary Flames beat the Phoenix Coyotes. My only complaint was how sticky the floor was! I think that years of spilt beer has turned the floor into fly paper.

Banff was just a beautiful as I remembered and the people just as warm. As ever I ate too much, but didn't drink too much - booze and skis don't mix.

The only sad point was that a guy died while we were there, in fact we were present around his death - the guys son fell through the ice on the frozen river and the guy went in after him, he got the kid out, but sixty seconds (only 60 seconds) in sub-zero water gave the guy a heart attack and he died there on the ice. C and I were walking along the river when we came upon the scene just as the emergency services arrived - I think it was already too late then.

I feel really relaxed now and am looking forward to seeing the kids in school again - the trip made me realise again what a great thing skiing is, so when I get back I'm going to start the prep for a school ski trip next year.

I have 50+ photos from the trip (mostly of snowy mountains), I may post a couple soon.

Right now I'm going to try to go to bed to see if I can get my body clock back on track.

Back from Canada

2006-04-13T22:46:00.000+01:00

I'm back from a great holiday in Canada - I'll post properly later, once I've got over eight hour on a plane with loud families, screaming girls and crying babies, and also when I've worked out what day and time it is - my clock say's it's late night my body says it's mid afternoon!

Marking finished

2006-03-19T16:46:00.000Z

It took me nearly all day yesterday, but I've completed the marking of my students' work - there are some really good pieces of work which should see the boys getting good final grades, but there are several boys who are just missing the grade by a few marks - I have to decide now whether or not to return their work to them and allow them to improve the work and break through the boundary, we said that we wouldn't do that this year so I'm unsure at the moment.

Also I'm a bit annoyed with myself, I made some more silver jewellery last night and this morning and as I was finishing it I managed to snap the top off - very annoying!, especially as the break is in a place I can't repair.

Got a phone message to say that the plane tickets for my trip to Canada are ready for me to pick up - I'm looking forward to collecting them, I'll know then that I'm definitely ready to go, unfortunately, the travel agent that has my tickets is in the middle of a large shopping centre, so I might have to go shopping as well as collect the tickets!

Busy week coming up - all the usual stuff plus a couple of pointless meetings that just serve to waste time.

Remembered to order a Mothers' Day gift for next weekend, just have to remember the card now.

I think that's it - take care all.

Coffee Break

2006-03-18T15:20:00.000Z

I'm taking a short break from marking my student's work - after working all year they've handed in their assignments and now i get to see if they've listened to me at all.

In fact most of this week has been geared to this small group of kids - most days after school I've given them time to work, and have answered questions from them wherever we've met around school.

Even after all these years I still get frustrated at how late some of the kids leave it to start their work - in some cases they've left it so late that I don't think they can recover.

It's especially frustrating when I've spent lots of time telling them what they need to do and chasing them to do it and now it's too late.

On the bright side, I enjoy marking the work cos most of the kids turn in some good stuff and I love to read it - they have to produce a 3 dimensional piece as well and yesterday I lined up all the complete or nearly complete pieces and they looked good. I have a favourite piece that I want to keep for myself but I can't, the lad who made it has worked so hard, he deserves a high grade (I have my fingers crossed that he'll get it).

Anyway, break over, I'm only two thirds through the assignments and i've deliberately left the best ones to the end so I'm looking forward to seeing those.

take care all.

Another week nearer my holiday

2006-03-12T20:13:00.000Z

I've been sitting staring at the little flashing cursor for a long time now and nothing worth writing has leapt into my mind.

Elmo scolded me the other day for writing about work too much so I'm going to try to avoid doing that - other than to say that I'm now actively looking for a new job, I think I really need to move on.

I've been trying to come up with some new jewellery designs but my brain's pretty much a blank - I want to keep using my little people but I want to change the material, I've used acrylic a lot, but no new ideas are coming.

Also I've been thinking about the fire a lot - I keep finding myself trying to work out what my escape plan would be and what things I would take with me - the stumbling block is how do you transport a goldfish if his tank is too big to move?

Anyway, nothing more to say.

night all

Nothing much happening

2006-03-05T19:46:00.000Z

I'm not sure why I'm writing this, I have nothing to say but I felt I couldn't leave my blog untouched for another week.

So, in summary, I've been off work with flu since tuesday and have spent most of the time asleep, sneezing or coughing.

It worry me a little that i've been out sick as many times as I have this year - it's about 7 days in total and usually I don't miss a day. I think some of the cause has been the amount of time I spend on duty out in the cold before going into a hot classroom and then back in to the cold, this is combined with days when I don't get a break all day so don't eat or drink properly - these things can't do my health any good.

I'm fit enough to return to work tomorrow and look forward to a barrage of all the things that haven't been done.

take care all

Latest Creations

2006-02-27T20:32:00.000Z

I thought I'd post the latest bracelets that I've made - these are all made in fine silver rather than the pewter I used previously. For my first attempts at silverwork I'm really pleased. My favourite piece is the simple black cord with hiv/aids ribbon - in fact it's the one I've been wearing most.

My next plan is to try to make in silver the male and female figure that I design earlier - that's going to be a challenge.

In other news, I saw the fire damage down the building today - the two top floor flats at the opposite end to me are completely gutted, there's no hint of roof at all - it's amazing to me that noone was hurt.

It's all a bit CSI

2006-02-26T14:01:00.000Z

Well the Fire Service were here all night making lots of noise while they cleared up and made things safe - I didn't get to sleep until 3am cos of the noise, but I don't mind since they didn't let me burn.

Anyway now we have the investigation team here going over the place trying to find out how the fire started. I've been out to throw some rubbish away and you can't see any real damage on the building from the front. I'm guessing that the real damage will be at the back since that's where the kitchen is and my money is on the fire starting in the kitchen - it seems the logical place.

For a fleeting moment I thought about taking pictures to post, but I really don't like people who gawk at others misfortune and i don't want to be one of those people. I'm just happy noone was hurt and that the fire didn't get to my home.

Dad's still ill, he's had a reaction to one of his new drugs, his tongue has swollen making speaking hard for him - he sounds like he's just come back from the dentist! Anyway he's now got anti-histamine to take to deal with the allergic reaction. He now takes so many pills that he rattles when he walks.

Get well soon Dad.

Saturday night excitement

2006-02-25T23:40:00.000Z

For the last three hours I've been on evacuation alert and have only just now been given the all clear.

One of the flats at the other end of my block caught fire and the fire brigade have been battling to put the fire out - fortunately there were no injuries other than a dog suffering from smoke inhalation (I'm being serious they called an emergency vet to tend to it!)

I guess that since it took three hours+ to put the fire out, the place must be pretty much destroyed - I'll know tomorrow when I go outside.

The evacuation warning was because my flat is in the same building as the burning one and there was a worry that the fire would spread, so I've sat here with a bag packed for three hours cos the police said that we would only get a few minutes warning if they decided to get us out.

So there we go, in my last post I said I wanted to rest and relax today and instead I get fires and evaluation alerts, tomorrow must surely be better.

The irony is that despite burning buildings next door, I'm really cold!

Update: It's now midnight and the Fire Brigade have just visited to make sure that me and my flat are ok after the night's excitement - good of them to check.

A tough couple of days

2006-02-25T16:55:00.000Z

It seems that lately too many bad or hard things have been happening in my life - I'm hoping that it's all just coincidence and not a change in my luck!

Anyway, work was work this week, the usual stuff with the boss making demands and setting really short deadlines, the kind of deadline that you can't meet without ignoring other things which you then get scolded for not doing!

But the worst part of my week was getting a call to say that my dad was back in hospital after collapsing - it was a worrying couple of days cos we didn't know what was wrong, if it was something new or his previous illness coming back again.

Obviously none of us got much sleep and for wednesday to friday I was working on a total of about 4 hours sleep - you can imagine how pleasant it was to be around me!

Dad's home now but is still a little weak and having some trouble breathing - it's an infection that needs time to clear, the huge amounts of antibiotic should help though.

I actually got some sleep last night, but the relief of dad coming home means that I now just want to relax a bit but I've got work to do before Monday - I think I'll leave that until tomorrow and take to day for rest.

In other news, thank heavens for the dabbling with jewellery making I've been trying, it gave me something to do while I couldn't sleep and I am working on a few new ideas - there not good enough to share yet, but soon.

take care all

Don't make me go

2006-02-19T16:57:00.000Z

Work starts again tomorrow and I don't want to go - there are way too many jobs waiting for me!

I wonder if anyone would notice if I took another week off?

Apparently I'm not too bright

2006-02-17T16:12:00.000Z

Having spent days complaining that I couldn't see the Olympic events that I wanted, I've now discovered videos and streams on the BBC website - I could have been watching loads more and didn't realise! I've now got women's slalom playing in the background while I type this, much better than the tv which seems to be wall to wall curling.

Good news yesterday was our first medal - a silver in the skeleton bob, an event which seems to be lying on a tea tray and throwing yourself head first down the bob run at over 80 miles an hour, I wonder if the lobotomy comes as part of the training!

Anyway, well done Shelly - her partner goes today in the men's skeleton so fingers crossed for him.

In other news, my break is nearly over and I can't believe how quick it's gone - so fast that I haven't yet done any of the work I brought home, I still don't have the inclination to do it!

Got a few more jewellery ideas so maybe I'll do those instead of work.

take care

Annoyed

2006-02-16T14:42:00.000Z

The one afternoon that I decide to run errands, the BBC decides to show olympic sports that I wanted to see.

I got back to discover that both Ice Hockey and Snowboard Cross had been showing. I only got to see about five minutes of Ice hockey, but I did get to see the final of the Men's Snowboard Cross - this could be my new favourite spectator sport, the women's race is tomorrow.

Anyway, I did get the errands I've been putting off all week done and driving through hailstones was fun if a bit noisy.

That's it for now

take care

Tried and failed

2006-02-13T22:31:00.000Z

The Olympics have been a big part of my viewing day - I was determined to watch the figure skating and curling to see if I could actually derive anything from watching them.

Alas they still do nothing for me, skiing, snowboarding, and luge all got the heart going and were fun to watch, but the skating and curling were just wallpaper between the other events.

I guess you can't like all sports (sports?) can you?

I want to see the ice hockey, but either the BBC isn't showing it or else it hasn't started yet - I got into watching it the last time I was in Canada, the enthusiasm of the guys in the bars is infectious. I don't understand the rules, the aim does seem to involve a puck but mostly just colliding with other men on skates - fun to watch though.

Anyway, that's it, sports report over - men's slalom tomorrow.

g'night all.

I miss the snow

2006-02-12T12:22:00.000Z

I wrote on Thursday that I wasn't missing the fact that I'm not skiing this week even after 12 years of always skiing at this time of year.

Turns out I lied, I want to be on the snow so much - not helped by the fact that the Winter Olympics are on and I've just watched the men's downhill.

I don't do any other sport except skiing and I'm not that good at it - I can do most slopes and usually survive unscathed, but I love it and now I miss it!

Thank God I am skiing in April so I just have to keep looking forward to that - 11 days in Banff, I can't wait.

I haven't got a school trip arranged for 2007 and I wasn't going to bother, I'd decided that no trip this year would be the natural break to the school trips, but right now I'm sworely tempted to start the arrangements for 2007 - need to think some more on that, it's a lot of work and I don't have much time these days.

Right that's all for now - the men's snowboarding coverage is about to start.

Still here.

2006-02-09T20:43:00.000Z

My last post was done just so that I could note down how I was feeling at that time - I was deeply touched at the support I got from a couple of people who'd read my post - thanks guys, you helped.

When I started my blog, I hadn't intended it to be any more than a diversion, a way to notes a few things happening in my life - I didn't seriously expect that anyone else would read it, after all the internet's huge so the chance of someone finding this was slim. But a couple of people have been reading and have been supportive when I've been down - there's a pleasant oddness about people I've never met or spoken to, looking out for me.

The issue I alluded to in my last post hasn't gone away, I just need to be patient and I think it should work out fine. In the meantime, I've a week of from work next week, so I can relax and do a few non work things - this will be the first February break in over twelve years where I won't be leading a school ski trip, and you know what?, I don't miss it - I probably will later in the week, but right now it would just be a hassle.

Anyway I've some work to do and I want bed at a reasonable hour.

take care all.

Scared

2006-02-05T13:36:00.000Z

Something bad's happened, I'm not going to be saying what it is but I want to record somewhere that I don't know what to do and I'm scared about the potential outcome.

All play and no work.....

2006-02-01T20:33:00.000Z

Elmo suggested that I put two guys onto a bracelet rather than the guy and girl I did yesterday, so never one to ignore a suggestion, I've done just that.

Also used the same images to create key rings and then, cos I was in the workshop, I made moulds and cast the guy figure in pewter. I'm not 100% happy with the result, I think that the figure's too thick and doesn't sit well on the jump rings - I need to work on it some more.

There was plenty of other things I should have been doing in work today, but I was having too much fun - besides, I will be using what I've learned when I teach some of the younger kids on Friday.

It occurs to me that, with all the pictures I've taken of my work (trust me, you have seen hardly any of it yet!), I seem to have taken up photography as well!

I'm thinking that I need to take pictures with the jewellery being worn now - I've no intention of selling the stuff, it's just a chance for me to get creative and maybe make a few gifts along the way.

The fruits of my labours

2006-01-31T18:38:00.000Z

Having decided to try my hand at making jewellery, I sat at the computer last night with an idea and started to design. The end result was little male and female figures each about 25mm tall, which took over two hours to get right.

Actually making the pieces was great fun and quite relaxing.

I know one figure is black - I made lots of different things in both black and white, so anything in one colour has also been made in the other.

My brain is full of lots of other possibilities now that I've made my first pieces.

Been a busy boy

2006-01-27T20:50:00.000Z

It's been a while but I'm back, albeit only briefly.

My cold cleared up in three days, which is usual for me, but I still have the inner ear/balance problem. Most of the day I'm fine, I just have to be careful about standing up or sitting quickly, the worst time is when I lay down to sleep or get up, I have to allow a minute or so while I wait for the room to stop spinning so that I can get off!

Been a busy couple of weeks - in my job there are times when I have little to do except teach (believe it or not I find that easy) but other times, like now when there's lots of censuses, data crunching, reports etc that all need to be done at the same time - I've got three major census things to do all with the same deadline (actually the deadline's today so I guess I missed it because of computer problems)

A few weeks back I wrote about needing a hobby to keep me away from work when I'm at home - I've tried photography (Elmo's idea) but I already take photos at work and it wasn't separate enough from work, I tried calligraphy, but again I write a lot anyway so it became a chore, I even tried bead weaving, but the beads were too small for me to see clearly (I refuse to wear my glasses!) and I kept jabbing a needle in myself so I stopped that.

But, I think I might have found the winner, after the bead weaving fiasco I was left with loads of beads and little idea what to do with them. I have a cupboard full of tools, I teach metal, wood and plastic work, so I've been trying my hand at jewellery making - it's fun, I get to play with my pliers and saws and stuff, play with shiny metals and beads and make things that I think kind of work.

I'm still at the experimenting stage and haven't any clear ideas for what to make, but I'm finding that I'm losing hours just playing - that's hours that I'm not working so that must be good.

I just need an idea for my first project, so if anyone has an idea (simple please) let me know - photos might be in order if I manage to make something well enough (bear in mind I'm a little bit of a perfectionist though!)

Anyway, I'm off to think creative thoughts

g'night all

Insult to injury

2006-01-17T22:05:00.000Z

Not only do I have this ear thing that makes me want to fall over, I've now caught cold so I'm sneezing all the time - when I sneeze I jerk my head, when I jerk my head I get dizzy - fun eh?

And I wound up covering a colleague's class this afternoon, so I didn't get quiet time in my office.

Right that's it - back to planning lessons now.

And the verdict is.....

2006-01-16T15:22:00.000Z

Had to call in sick this morning - I couldn't sit up in bed without the world spinning madly, it stayed spinning when I lay back down too.

When I could focus I called the doctor and managed to get an appointment this morning - fortunately, an hour or so after I woke up I could stand without feeling too bad and was able to walk to the doctor - I didn't dare drive!

I was expecting a blood pressure problem, but apparently my pressure's normal which surprised me given what I do for a living. The diagnosis is an inner ear infection and I've just got to wait it out - which could take weeks apparently.

I was amused when the doctor told me to take things easy - maybe I should have taken him to meet my boss!

Anyway, I have no classes tomorrow so I can spend the day working quietly in my office, that's assuming I don't end up covering somebody else's classes.

Another job done

2006-01-14T23:17:00.000Z

I am now offically going to Canada at Easter.

C and I booked our trip today - 11 days in Banff with lots of sking to do.

Took forever to book the trip - the travel agent didn't seem to know how to work her computer thingy and had to keep sending for the manager, but it's done now - hooray.

Been a while since I wrote last - been very busy at work and it'll get worse for the next few weeks.

I've been keeping to my goal of leaving work on time at least twice a week, next week I'm starting on trying to delgate more - that'll be tough since i'm such a control freak.

Not been feeling too well - I'm dizzy a lot of the time, especially when I lay down - making an appointment to see the doctor next week - my friendly local pharmacist thinks I might have a blood pressure problem, C thinks it's an inner ear problem, I think it's not fair that the world's spinning and I'm not actually drunk!

Anyway, tired now so I need to sleep

Look out below!

2006-01-04T17:43:00.000Z

C and I have decided that when we get to Canada at Easter, as well as lots of skiing we both want to learn to snowboard.

So in that vein I bought myself a gift - a snowboarding video game with a controller that you stand on and "ride" the slopes on screen.

I am so so bad at it - the first ten minutes I couldn't get the thing to turn left or right when I wanted. No matter how hard I leaned over it seemed to always go in the opposite direction, then I realised that I had the thing the wrong way round on the floor!

Yes, I have fallen off of it already, yes I have shouted at the tv a lot and yes I'm having huge fun!

My only worry is that I'm so bad that I might have to call in sick with a snowboard injury gained in my own living room!

I have work to do but, I'm going to go play again instead.

Take care all.

Break's Over

2006-01-02T13:29:00.000Z

Well, I'm due back at work tomorrow and I'm really not ready - I'm just starting to get used to sleeping late and not doing a lot.

I haven't done any of the work that I brought home with me and I don't care that much!

I've decided to try to get the balance between work and life a little more even this year, I'm not calling it a New Year's Resolution 'cos those never last.

I need to delegate more, despite becoming senior management over a year ago, I still do all the same jobs as I did before as well as the new ones - I need to pass the smaller jobs over and manage more.

I need to say no to the boss more, or at least tell him when he's asking for more than I can give.

Finally, it is my intention to leave work within half an hour of school finishing at least twice a week so that I can come home or do something not work related.

C and I have decided to book our skiing trip to Canada as soon as we can, we just need to check out the Easter holiday dates - we've decided to go back to Banff, the town was great, the people fab, the food good and the skiing the right mix for both of us.

Finally finally, I've decided not to resign - I thought a lot over the holiday and realised that I would be resigning becasue of the boss, not because I don't like the school and the people there. Why should I quit just because of him - I'll do my job to the best of my ability and if that's not good enough for him then he'll have to fire me!

The only question that I'm left with is, if I don't quit does that mean that I should organise a ski trip for the boys for 2007?

Take care all.

OK so I was wrong....

2005-12-28T23:53:00.000Z

I thought when I last posted that the weather forecast was wrong and we wouldn't be getting snow.

What did I find when I woke up today? Snow.

However, it wasn't a lot of snow - the total amount of snow in the carpark outside might have filled a coffee mug, and by the time I thought to take a photo (several hours later), it had all but melted.

Very cold now though - I've got all the heating on and I can still feel a chill, maybe there'll be more snow tonight.

Watched "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" today - I'm old enough to remember the Gene Wilder version, but I think I liked the Tim Burton one more. Although Johnny Depp does bring a touch of the serial killer/psychopath to the role of Willy Wonka - not someone you'd really want giving sweets to small children!

That's it for today, g'night all.

I'm back!

2005-12-28T00:24:00.000Z

Well, here I am, back from Christmas with the parents.

Came back a day early cos the weathergirl on TV forcast heavy snow - and on the map it looked to be on top of my house! The snow was forcast for today, so I drove back down yesterday, following my sister part of the way. I still don't like that drive, it's only 130 miles, but it feels never ending, my fear of motorways doesn't seem to stop.

I did feel guilty about coming back early cos my mum cried when I said that I was going to leave - she was enjoying having the whole family nearby, it was the first time in a long time that me, my two brothers and my sister were all present in mum and dad's house at the same time, about a year I think.

No sign of any snow here though!. But mum phoned this morning and said that they'd got the snow so driving home was the right thing to do - she wasn't so upset now that she'd seen the snow.

Dad was really pleased we were all there, he was determined to have a good Christmas after spending last Christmas in hospital. He did get sick, but that was through too much food and drink - serves him right!

My youngest brother's girlfriend is hard work - she doesn't speak except in monosyllables, wears a beanie with her hood on constantly and rarely smiles. Oh and wears clothes that cover her totally - the only bit you see is her face. I'm guessing she has some insecurites about her body!

My niece actually spoke to me this trip - she's usually too shy, in fact this time she insisted I play with her - we had to play spelling games, not so easy when she invents the spelling of words!

My nephew is still just as volatile as ever - his tantrums switch on and off constantly.

Anyway, I'm home now, where I'm supposed to do some schoolwork - but I don't want to do it yet so I wont!

I enjoyed being with the family, but I do enjoy being in my own home - I think it's because I don't feel in control of my life when I'm in my parent's home and I do like to be in control - I know I need to be less anal, but it's hard to do.

I'm sleeping a lot at the moment which is good in a sense, but it does mean that I'm too awake to go to bed at a sensible time and that will come back to bit me next week when I have to return to work.

That said, I'm going to go to bed and watch tv/dvd for a while.

G'night world

I'm free, I'm free, I'm free....

2005-12-18T22:31:00.000Z

......or at least I am for a couple of weeks.

School's finished for the Christmas break now and it hasn't come a minute too soon.

Now all I have to do is get the last few things ready before I travel to mum and dad's on tuesday.

The last week at school was so long - it just felt like I'd run out of energy and was having trouble getting to the finishing post, but as N said, he and I started our term a week before everbody else because we'd been in fixing timetables, class lists and such.

Anyway it's over now.

Tomorrow I need to get the last bit of shopping done - mainly stuff for me, things I need on my trip away. Then there's the whole dull housecleaning thing to do.

I probably won't post again until I get back and maybe I'll have something worth writing about, but until then to anyone reading this - Happy Christmas.

PS - try to spare a thought for someone else during the mass eating and drinking.

I'm a little bit proud.

2005-12-11T21:11:00.000Z

Just finished marking my boys' Mock Exam papers and I'm pleased with the results.

Not only did they all actually turn up and take the paper (I'd expected that at least two of them wouldn't show), they all scored grades at their estimated level or better.

It's a shame that I can't tell them their results until January, when they get all of their results.

But I can say well done here - Well Done Boys!

I'm not ready

2005-12-11T17:49:00.000Z

Christmas is coming and I'm not ready - I've still got quite a few gifts to buy and the time available to me to shop is getting short.

At least the school-based gifts for secretaries, technicians etc are easy - wine and chocolate, same as ever, I just need to go get them.

I haven't written or sent any christmas cards and I rather think that I'm going to miss the final posting date.

I'm planning on missing a meeting after school tomorrow so that I can get to the art shop to buy mum's present and hopefully something for my sister - I hoped to get to Bluewater this week to do a big shop, but I don't think I'm going to make it - I'll have to make do with the local town centre.

I haven't any idea what to buy for C - I have the same problem every year and I don't want to have to resort to CD's again thisa year.

Spoke to mum today - she's looking forward to me spending christmas with her and dad - I am too, it's just the drive there I hate. I hope to spend about a week up there and come back around New Year - that'll leave me a few days for me before I go back to work.

Right, that's it, a dull update, but an update nonetheless.

take care all

I'm quite confused now...

2005-12-07T20:57:00.000Z

Reason 1 - Yesterday Blogger ate this blog and no matter what I tried to do I couldn't get it back - now miraculously it's back and I don't understand why.

Reason 2 - The Boss called me in to his office this evening, I assumed for another scolding or to give me more work, but it wasn't - apparently the Board of Governors has agreed his recommendation to give me a salary increase, backdated to September! I'm now confused about the whole is he bullying me/should I resign? thing - I mean he can't have a downer on me and still recommend a salary increase, can he?

Reason 3 - All of my Year 11 students turned up and took their exam - that's unheard of, they rarely all turn up to class. I've not marked the papers yet, but all of them sitting it must be a good sign - or maybe they're plotting something and this was an attempt to throw me off the scent.

I'm going through an animated movie phase at the moment - shrek, shark tale, chicken run, finding nemo, the incredibles and many others have been watched over the last few days - I'd forgotten how much I love cartoony films.

Finally, I'm giving in to christmas this evening and listening to christmas songs - just made a playlist so that I can play my Ipod in school tomorrow -the boys love it when I choose music for them - they were especially baffled by Sigur Ros last week!

Anyway the bath is calling (what, doesn't everyone have a talking bath?) and I want to enjoy the bubbles.

G'night all

Help, my Brain's melting

2005-12-05T22:34:00.000Z

It's been a while since I've had a migraine this bad - the only reason I'm posting is to try to do something other than sit and groan.

I've had the full light show, elephant in the head, throwing up migraine this time - my usual medication hasn't helped much but it's a little easier now, at least I've stopped getting sick.

What isn't helping my recovery is that I am furious - I was trying to sleep this morning, sleeping usually helps, when the phone rang (I'd forgotten to turn it off).

It was the Boss's secretary he'd told her to ring me with a string of work related questions - it was hard to stay civil, actually it was hard to think and see, never mind stay civil.

I'm furious that he would think it ok to phone me and expect work stuff when I'd called in sick - I think I'm going to class that as harassment.

I was going to go in to school tomorrow regardless of how I feel - I rarely take any days off and two is unheard of, but as I still have pain and some nausea, I'm going to stay in bed - it was the phonecall that tipped the balance.

Still angry but feeling better for posting.

G'night world

All about me

2005-12-04T21:41:00.000Z

I thought that as I've been in a list writing mood lately, I would write one about me:

I have a terrible temper -it's explosive, volatile and hard to keep in check.
I'm extremely arrogant.
I'm prideful and won't accept help from anyone.
I put up barriers to protect myself from hurt - they make me seem cold and emotionless, that's so far from the truth.
I'm shy, except in situations where I'm in control - new people scare me.
I'm insecure about everything to do with myself and my abilities.
I'm feeling the stress of my job more and more.
I think I want to quit my job - but I don't know what else I'd do.
I love shopping - at the minute especially for music.
I'm not very good at being a grown up - I sometimes just want to stay in bed and pretend that I have no responsibilities.
Nobody knows the real me - although my best friend knows more than most.
I'm terrible at keeping in touch with people - I just don't do the spontaneous phonecall thing.
I find it hard to relax at work.
Stubbornness and a lack of flexibility is my default position.
Sad stories, music, movies etc make me cry.
I like to look good when I'm teaching - I love suits and ties.
Shaving annoys me and I love my goatee - i look about 12 without it!

Right that enough to be going on with, more later. Sides I now have the pretty lights and stomach cramp that tells me a migraine's on the way - it's gonna be a painful few hours.

night world

To Do List Update

2005-12-02T19:11:00.000Z

Feeling a bit smug right now - of the eight things on this week's to do list, I managed to complete 5:

I organised the school photos for this morning and it went well - even had myself done just for fun.
I scolded staff and students about homework - and yes it did make me oh so popular!
Organised this week's set of interviews and they seemed to have worked.
Finally, I went on my training course yesterday and actually learned some useful stuff, it was all dry statistical analysis stuff but the skills I learned will be useful.
Cheated on the Christmas shopping thing - Amazon is such a fabulous invention!

Things that didn't happen:

Didn't take any photos myself - I honestly just forgot.
Didn't get scolded by the Boss until Wednesday - I'm getting to the end of the line with that guy, I'm either gonna have to quit or make a formal complaint about what I see as him bullying me.
Haven't bared my soul on here, but since I haven't posted either, I couldn't really do the soul baring bit - maybe over the weekend.

Quite a dull update but I will post more this weekend.

The Holiday Ten

2005-12-02T19:09:00.000Z

Tagged by Elmo again - this is a fun one and anyone reading it should do it.

1. What is your favorite holiday movie?
Santa Clause the Movie - reminds me of being at college.

2. What is your favorite holiday song (title and artist)?
Silent Night - sung by anyone who can do it properly, if it was in german and sung properly then I'd be in heaven.

3. What's the best holiday gift you were ever given, and why?
My dad coming through his cancer operation last christmas - the next best gift will be celebrating christmas with him prperly this year.

4. Do you have a special someone to kiss at the stroke of midnight on New Year's?
Nope, not at the present.

5. Name of your favorite reindeer?
Blitzen - just like how the name sounds. I've always been very proud that I can name all of santa's reindeer - Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph although I've always thought Rudolph doesn't count cos he doesn't rhyme with the rest.

6. Favorite Holiday food?
Breakfast cooked by my dad on Christmas morning - it's just bacon sandwiches but they taste so good when dad makes them.

7. Snow day -- cuddle by the fire, or hand me a snowball?
Gotta be the snowball, I love snow, but you need to be in it with someone you love.

8. What was your New Year's resoloution for this year? Did you stick to it?
Sorry, don't do New Year's resolutions.

9. Is there really a Santa Claus?
Yep, he shares an office with the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny

10. Present, or stocking stuffer?
Both, in my family when we were little we would have the stocking on christmas morning, usually with an overflow bag! then in the evening, my mum would suddenly announce "noises" from upstairs and send us up to investigate. We would find piles of presents waiting for us - a second delivery if you like. Yes I do think we were spoiled!

Thanks Elmo - that was fun.

This week's to do list

2005-11-27T22:06:00.000Z

Among other things this week, I need to do the following things:

Visit the lessons of other staff and scold them for not setting homework and children for not doing homework - that should add to my popularity.

Organise the school photos catch-up session - some of the kids in their final year missed last months session and have been chasing me to set up a catch-up for them, cos I'm a lovely guy we're gonna do it friday - staff will complain cos they always do, even when it doesn't involve or affect them.

Organise this week's parent interviews - only one more week to go after this one and then there's all the follow up paperwork.

Go on a training course on thursday - must remember to organise work for the classes I'll be leaving.

Do some christmas shopping - immediate family stuff first.

Get scolded by the Boss - I don't think I've done anything wrong, but he won't let that stop him!!

I want to take some photos this week - don't know what of, but I want to go out and do something different for a change.

Share more of the real me in this blog - maybe.

I'm now open for bets as to how many of these jobs I get done this week.

Music

2005-11-26T21:32:00.000Z

One of my pleasures is music and this last few weeks the albums most played have been:

Antony & the Johnsons - "I am a bird now" & "Antony & the Johnsons"
Nizlopi - "Half these songs are about you"
Il Divo - "Ancora"
Donavon Frankenreiter - "Donavon Frankenreiter"

All five different from each other and all fabulous. All great songs, but Nizlopi's "JCB" edges in front.

How do you insulate a business suit?

2005-11-26T18:56:00.000Z

I'm so cold - we actually had snow today, it was only a few flakes, but the wind that came with it was freezing.
Now we all know that I love snow and the whole winter sports thing, but I'm usually dressed for that, when I'm wearing a business suit, I'm not a fan of the cold.

The sweet part was that I think just about every kid came and told me it was snowing and did it make me happy - I think perhaps my passion for skiing and snow isn't a secret!

I didn't have the heart to tell them I was hating every second cos bits of me were frozen that should be allowed to freeze! Sides, one flake every thirty seconds doesn't really count as snowing, but most of these kids haven't seen real snow, so I forgive them!

I am proud of myself today, but for fairly pathetic reasons - I went against my professional instincts and did go into school an hour late this morning and I was gone within thirty minutes of close of business. Both of these things don't sit easily with me, but after last night I needed to do it.

Someone ask me how much gratitude I got from the Boss today for staying late last night and supervising the repairs to the roof while he had a great time in the pub. Go on ask.

OK, I'll ask "Nykk, how much gratitude did you get from the Boss?"

Answer - none at all, he didn't speak to me until I was leaving this evening and then he just said goodbye.

Well, I've decided that even if the school gets picked up by a tornado and dropped on someone with a pointy hat and red shoes, I shall be staying at home drinking tea and eating chocolate.

Back to being cold, I'm writing this surrounded by all of my ski clothes, well not all, just the bits that can be worn as winter warm stuff - after freezing on the playground today I'm going to make sure that I have all my bits snuggly warm from now on. I wonder where in my suit I can put a hot water bottle.

Anyway take care world and stay warm.

Is it a bird?, is it a plane?.......

2005-11-24T20:31:00.000Z

Nope, it's a window!

I know I complain about my working life a lot (yes alright, a lot a lot a lot), but I can honestly say it's rarely boring.

Today had gone on as usual, then about 2.15pm the weather changed for the worse with wind, rain and hail as forcast. This went on for a while.

About 3pm two of the skylights on our new building blew off, they fell about seventy feet to the ground narrowly missing two members of staff (who may now have new found faith in the Lord!). These windows are 2.5 feet square, double glazed and framed with aluminium - had they hit, they would have killed the two people concerned.

The most worrying part is that if it had happened 30 minutes earlier, the "landing area" would have been filled with about 300 boys leaving school - death and maiming would have been likely.

So instead of leaving school at about 3.30pm as planned today, I stayed for an additional 4.5 hours supervising the repairs, oh the joys of being me!

I'm going in late tomorrow to make up for the extra time today - or rather I've been given leave to come in late, but I know that I'll probably be more or less on time.

From now on I shall look up before leaving any of our buildings and I've just parked my car well away from the scaffolding surrounding my home at the moment - just to be safe!

Anyone know where I can buy hard hats in a range of colours to match my suits and if so how do you accessorise them?

Just trying something...

2005-11-23T18:09:00.000Z

As you all know I'm still learning about blogging, so I thought I'd try a photo.

This is a shot of one of my all-time favourite places - a Canadian ski slope, Banff, I think. - I so want to be there now, especially after looking at the pictures again.

I Want.....

2005-11-21T19:29:00.000Z

I'm avoiding work by letting my mind wander and it's wandered into "I want" mode. so here's a list:

I want a new car, mine's only 3 years old but I like new cars.
I want some new suits - I like suits.
I want a new house - I think I've outgrown living in a flat.
I want to go skiing - I miss the snow.
I want a new bed - mine's old and uncomfortable now.
I want to look good in wooly hats - my head gets very cold, but I look silly in wooly hats and i'm too proud (or is it stupid?) to look silly.
I want to be less short-tempered.
I want a drink - where's the Jack Daniels?
I want more time in the day - why do my days seem to only have space for worky type things?
I want to go shopping - I like shopping.
I want to see the new Harry Potter.
I want to snuggle under my duvet now - can't though, need to do some prep for tomorrow.
I want there to be someone else cleaning the ice off my car in the morning so that I don't have to.
I want a new office - mine's too small for the paper mountain that's developing on, around and under my desk.
I want a good set of speakers so that I can play my ipod in my office.
I want to be better at being nice to people - I'm too distant at times.
I want a hug - actually, cancel that, Ryan put one in his comment to my last post - thanks Ryan.
I want to go to work tomorrow and just do my own job for a change.
I want something sweet.
I want to know why my DVD player keeps playing the same scene over and over again, but i'm too lazy to get up and find out.
I want a bath 'cos I'm cold - I think that's a cue to stop now and run a bath, pity I've run out of bubbles, hmm, I wonder if shower gel might make bubbles.

See, I can write lists that don't just have jobs in them

Take care world.

Catching up

2005-11-19T15:12:00.000Z

As I predicted when I started blogging, the frequency of my posts decreases during term time, but I'm still trying to post at least once a week - here's this week's update.

It goes without saying that I'm still snowed under at work - but this week something new came up, I'm now getting scolded because other people call in sick and I'm too busy to take on their work as well as my own! Perhaps the Biology department could work on cloning me for Christmas.

Thought I'd got away without a Friday call into town by the police, but no such luck - I got called to another local school, they claim our boys had trespassed on their site and wanted me to identify the boys from their CCTV - I don't know about you, but identifying someone from a grainy picture of the back of their body is something I can't do.

Anyway, on the way back I found myself with the police again supervising kids in town - maybe i should just give in a join the police!

Didn't get to the ski slope this week, and I'm annoyed about that.

Only one suggestion on the hobby front - Elmo suggested photography - I used to do a bit of that, so maybe I'll try it again, I don't use my digital camera as much as I ought.

Mum and Dad are coming for dinner tomorrow so I'm looking forward to that.

That's it for now.

To anyone reading - enjoy yourselves.

Dear World........

2005-11-16T21:10:00.000Z

I work too hard and need to take up a pasttime not related to working.

My open question to anyone who's looking at this is:

What should my new hobby be and why?

Tag, I'm it

2005-11-15T20:28:00.000Z

twice in the last few weeks, Elmo has tagged me, so here are my responses:

Tag the First: 5 favourite quotes:

Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off - I just like the sound of this one.

Perdition catch my soul but I do love thee and when I love thee not, chaos is come again. Act 3 Scene 3 Othello - just about all I can remember from English Literature classes

You must unlearn what you have learned. Yoda, The Empire Strikes Back - some days at work it seems like I'm unteaching the kids rather than teaching them, so this seems apt.

How could I possibly be expected to handle school on a day like this? Ferris Bueller’s Day Off - what can i say, I'm a teacher!

This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time. Fight Club - just because.

and I'm cheating I wanted a sixth:
I know you’re very busy, but...... My Boss! - he says this several times a week, just before giving me more jobs.

Tag the Second: You just found a genie in a bottle and he grants you three wishes...

1) Must be for yourself.

2) Must be for humanity as a whole.

3) Must be for someone close to you.
And you cant make the same wish as the person who tagged you.

Wish 1 - I wish that I could spend all the time that I want on the ski slopes of Canada and not have to worry about anything else.
Wish 2 - I wish that everybody realised that it's our differences that make us who we are and that we should all be valued for those differences.
Wish 3 - I wish that my Dad's health continues to improve and that his cancer stays in remission.

There, it's taken a long time but I've caught up with everything.

Just a normal Monday

2005-11-14T21:35:00.000Z

I thought that today was going to be just as dull as a normal working day, but I was wrong - the Head of the Department that I work in has gone on long term sick leave, so I found out today that I'm expected to take over running the department along with all of my other duties - so much for trying to reduce my 44 item to do list (yes, that's right, still no items ticked off), I now have to watch out for his classes as well as my own, do all my other work and keep the interview process on track.

I am very tempted to take a sick day myself, just to make the point that I can't do everything - my health is suffering, I can feel my patience wearing thin and my temper getting shorter, plus the long hours are affecting my energy levels.

What I really need is a few days on the snow, but there isn't any here in the UK and I don't have the time to go away during term time - the best I can do is spend an hour on the artificial ski slope, maybe I'll do that this week.

The boss is out again tomorrow so that he can work from home, why aren't I allowed to take days off like that?

In other news, going to the supermarket this evening was fun, I thought it would take ten minutes on the way home, but when I got there the place was surrounded by police and I was only allowed in on the top floor and only allowed to shop with a handbasket - there'd been an "incident" earlier and the ground floor was sealed off. I heard from other customers that a thief had been chased through the car park and had fallen from the upper deck - that may or may not be true, but it continues the theme of police that runs through this blog.

On the topic of police, I got called into town by the police again on Friday - they expected another fight, this time between two of the gangs that exist in this area - I spent an hour getting our boys on the buses, but no fights happened, pretty much a waste of my evening, again.

A full day teaching tomorrow, which at least means I can't get called out to do yet more jobs.

Very tired again - my body's fine, but I'm sure my brain is melting, in fact it might be about to drip onto my keyboard!

Take care world.

Remembering

2005-11-11T21:06:00.000Z

A few years ago I lost a friend on November 11th.

She'd fought long and hard against cancer, but in the end she couldn't fight any longer.

Sharon holds a special place in my heart - when I was younger, I was very insecure about lots of things and although we never openly discussed any of the things that worried me, Sharon made me feel better about myself just by being there, by a tenderness of touch (often a shoulder or back massage) or by making me laugh.

I met Sharon when I went to College and we didn't immediately become friends. Our first proper meeting was strange, we were in a lecture when some of us were taken away to be part of a photo shoot for a book - somewhere in the world is an education textbook containing a photo of Sharon and I pretending to be a couple - I don't know why we had to be a couple and I never found out what the book was called, but I thank the Lord for that book because it brought Sharon into my life.

Even then I didn't get that close to Sharon but when a close friend of mine rented a room in Sharon's house, I got to know her better and soon my visits to the house would be as much about seeing Sharon as seeing my friend.

Even when she ill, Sharon was great to be around and didn't let her illness slow her down.

Sharon had a passion for life that I envy still and it makes me sad that she didn't get to have more. I'm reminded of her every time I see bright colours - Sharon always wore something bright and cheerful - the opposite of my usual sober colours

I don't think of Sharon as much as I ought, but today is Sharon's Day.

Sleep well Sharon, one day I'll see you again for another back massage.

Tired Nykk

2005-11-09T20:13:00.000Z

Well, it looks from Joe's blog that he's still with us, but obviously upset - I hope he comes back properly soon.

I'm very tired - it's been a very busy week so far.

The boss has been working from home this week which has meant lots of phonecalls from him, asking for extra bits of info - without considering that we've got our own work to do, pick up the slack from his absence and deal with the absence of several other staff.

On top of this, the five straight weeks of parent interviews that I coordinate has started - I was at work at 6.30am on Monday to get ready for the first interview at 9am - I had to prep the rooms, organise refreshments, check the computers loads of dull stuff.

We're three days in and I'm exhausted - as the interviews are my baby it means that I'm on call all day every day from early til late, as well as working my usual workload.

I wrote another to do list earlier, after working on the original list of 45 items for the last three days, the new list stands at 45 items!

Tomorrow is a late day - we have an evening function and I've got jobs to do there as well.

I have to keep reminding myself that I chose this job!

I've decided not to hand in my resignation letter yet - we have set resignation deadlines and the next is a few months away, I can't quit before Easter, so i've got time to think about my next move.

Going to bed now and I'm gonna try not to think about not getting home until after 11pm tomorrow - 16 hour days are my favourite!

Concern for strangers

2005-11-06T19:45:00.000Z

Every now and then I read Joe's blog at www.steppinouttodance.blogspot.com, he seems like a nice guy, coping with life and it's frustrations.

Yesterday Joe had a fairly normal post up, but today everything seems to be gone except for a single line - "I'm so sorry"

Now I really don't know Joe at all, but that single line concerns me.

I know why it concerns me, I just don't want to verbalise my concern in case writing it makes it happen.

I hope Joe's OK.

g'night world

Dull Saturday

2005-11-05T22:13:00.000Z

After the excitement of the last two days, today was dull.

All I've done today is laundry, work, and watch the three original Star Wars movies, and the Harry Potter Movies.

No fights, no Police, just the sound of hundreds of fireworks in the background which lit my bathroom up with pretty colours while I was in the bath earlier!

G'night

And then......

2005-11-04T21:25:00.000Z

So, yesterday was fun, but I was hoping for a more usual day today and I got it - well nearly.

I had a great day teaching, the boys were focussed, and at break and lunch the sun was shining and the boys chatty - all round pretty good.

The only downside was Phys Ed guy telling his war stories from last night - the story seemed to get better each time! He was making light of the whole thing and I didn't think that appropriate.

Got to about 4pm and i was ten minutes away from being ready to leave when i got a call from the front office - the police had called for our assistance in the Town Centre which is only about a five minute walk away.

N and I got there to find 300+ students from a range of schools (five schools all use the bus stops in the town centre) and about 30-40 police officers as well as staff from a couple of the orher schools.

It seems that a group from out of the area had come to town looking to start fights and there'd been small scuffles, fireworks were thrown into the crowd and lots of kids were refusing to leave, in the hope that a huge fight would kick off.

Our job was to try to get our boys to leave, most did but one or two were intent on causing trouble - a few wound up getting arrested and/or searched.

The atmosphere was so volatile that even the covert police team came out to assist.

I imagine that if you had just been in town to shop the whole situation would have scared the life out of you - this isn't the first time it's happened so I wasn't unduly worried myself.

I do have an escape strategy in place should anything kick off in these situations - I run!, I know the interiors of most of the shops so I know where to be safe! I'm not a police officer so I have no intention of doing all of their job for them.

It's interesting to note that my boss was the only headteacher not present and last night he wasn't around to help with Angry Dad.

I'm trying to choose a safer career path, I'm thinking Front Line Troops, Test Pilot, Lion Tamer, any other suggestions?

A Selfless Act of Stupidity

2005-11-03T18:03:00.000Z

I was going to blog about why I've written my resignation letter (haven't submitted it yet though) but something's just happened that I want to note down while I think of it.

It's been a good day, busy but good and at the end of the day I was in my office doing some paperwork and marking as well as supervising a lad in detention. It got to about 5pm and I was getting ready to leave when there was a knock at my door.

Standing in the doorway was a strange man - it turned out he was a parent and some boys had let him through the security doors - stupid, stupid boys!

Anyway, this guy was angry and big - over six feet tall, he claimed that one of our Phys Ed staff had mistreated his son. The guy was very angry and wanted something done, so I was doing the usual placating and questioning bit - something I've done loads of times before.

A short while later the mum and the boy concerned turned up and I got the boy to explain everything to me and said that i would investigate tomorrow - school had ended hours ago so very few staff were around. Anyway, the guy wasn't happy and was quite threatening in his behaviour toward me, in terms of wanting to make sure that I did something quickly - I've been doing this for a long time so I wasn't unduly worried.

I assured the family I would investigate and they left, by this time my good friend and colleague N had appeared, he'd been outside my door making sure I was safe - we decided to walk to the exit to check that the family had left.

When we got outside Angry Dad was nose to nose with our Phys Ed teacher and they were trading comments, as N and I approached they were arguing over the details of the incident and the Angry Dad was getting angrier.

Suddenly he threw off his jacket ready to fight with our Phys Ed guy, and this is where the selfless act of stupidity comes in, without thinking I stepped between the two of them, placing my body between Phys Ed guy and danger.

Now, I know you're thinking how brave I am to protect a colleague in that way - the fact is that if Angry Dad had wanted Phys Ed gut, I couldn't have stopped him -

Angry Dad = 6 feet tall security guard
Phys Ed Guy = stocky, 15 stone, rugby player
Me = 5' 8" and light enough to be blown away by a gentle breeze.

What was I thinking!

Anyway no punches were thrown, I wound up stood in the middle of about five minutes of boring macho chest beating, until Angry Dad decided to swear at all of us, threaten Phys Ed guy before getting into his car and leave
Usually the next step is to write staements, call the police and leave it there, so N and I retired to our offices to start the paperwork and so that I could thank N for standing watching! He claims to have been poised to protect me should anything happen, but that he felt I was in control of the situation and would have been offended if he'd pitched in! I shall of course, be letting his tyres down tomorrow!

For me the most annoying part of the whole thing was leaving with N later and as we left we heard Phys Ed guy relating the story to someone - oddly it was a different story to mine and he was claiming that he could have taken Angry Dad - I'm sorry but, no chance, Angry Dad would have killed him. I hate this macho thing where we have to be seen to be violent, neanderthal, fatheads who solve all with our fists.

My question is this though - where on my contract did it mention this type of potential danger and is there extra money for protecting staff from stupidity?

I wonder what tomorrow will bring!

Shush - it's a secret.

2005-11-02T19:49:00.000Z

Just drafted my resignation letter.

Spending time on the Dark Side

2005-11-01T20:15:00.000Z

I should be marking today's test papers, but something much more important has come up - my copy of the latest Star wars DVD was waiting for me this morning, so as soon as I got home the TV went on and I've done nothing but watch the film.

If I don't do the marking I'm going to need an excuse tomorrow, let's think....

The dog ate my marking?
My pen ran out of ink?
I left the papers in my office?
I couldn't be bothered and watched a film instead?

Any ideas?

Training Day

2005-10-31T21:00:00.000Z

I enjoy staff training days at school for two main reasons.

Firstly, I can usually get a lot done when there are only staff in the building - I love teaching and spending time with the kids, but they be demanding, a little peace and quiet is great sometimes.

Secondly, I enjoy being on the receiving end of teaching, it can be pleasurable to let someone elses words and ideas wash over me and to follow rather than give instructions. I don't get to do this often but I love to learn new things.

So I was looking forward to today's training, unfortunately those pleasant feelings were gone within twenty minutes of getting into school.

I discovered that the programme for the day had changed and I was leading part of the training - I had thirty minutes to plan, prepare and then deliver training for 50+ people on a new piece of software!

I was to be working with a colleague - one I work really well with, he also had a short time to prepare, but he'd known in advance that he was speaking.

It went well, fortunately I knew the software well, my only worry was that I was demonstrating with live data rather than training data, the concern is always that you might make irreparable mistakes.

This was followed by staff having hands on time with the software - the IT knowledge gaps were huge, questions ranged from "where can I find the audit trail track changes?" to "what do you mean right click?"!

The rest of the day was spent supporting staff as they worked, that is until the Boss found something he didn't like in the work I'd done last week and that staff were working with today. This meant I had to unpick and rebuild half a day's work from last week and do it in an hour.

School finishes at 2.30pm, I left at 5pm having completed the work but with a sore brain.

Teaching is to be disrupted tomorrow - we have two Masses to attend as it's Halloween, or the Feast of all Hallows on our calendar. I'm proddy but I do enjoy Mass and as I don't get to church as much as I ought, the chance to get a blessing is always welcome.

I'm very tired now so an early night is called for.

See ya tomorrow

Policemen and Ironing

2005-10-30T20:57:00.000Z

When I went to bed last night I thought that today was going to be one with sleeping late and then doing very little for the rest of the day, but I was wrong.

I went to bed looking forward to having an extra hour in bed cos the clocks went back, so I wasn't too happy to be woken before seven by the sound of people buzzing the door entry thing, getting let in by a neighbour and then banging on doors - I'd ignored them pressing my door buzzer and then ignored them knocking on my door, after all nobody that knows me would dare to turn up at 7am on a Sunday morning and expect to get let in.

I got back to sleep for a bit but was woken up again a couple of hours later by exactly the same things, door buzzers and knocking on my door - this time I got up, determined to explain my irritation to whoever was outside.

By the time I got to the door I could hear them talking and knocking on my neighbour's door before knocking mine again, I was annoyed by then and opened the door ready to argue, that is until I saw the uniforms, standing in the hall were two large policemen.

Now, I sometimes work with the police and am known to some of the officers in town (I'll tell you why some other time, but it worries my mother!), but you don't expect to find them on your doorstep on a Sunday morning - turns out they wanted to know about my neighbour, I had to describe him to them in detail and they didn't seem too pleased with the description, I guess someone had given them this address instead of their own - they wouldn't say why they were there, just wished me a good day and left me wondering.

I've spent the day inventing stories in my head about murders, armed robberies and drug rings to explain the visit this morning - in my defence, I didn't have anything else to do.

That was the sum total of the day's excitement, although there were a few heated words when I burnt myself on the iron this afternoon.

Back to work tomorrow and I know that by lunchtime this holiday will have been forgotten.

Target for this Half Term - book my Easter trip to Canada and organise the School Ski Trip - either February 2006, or 2007 or both.

Good night all

An almost lazy Saturday

2005-10-29T16:58:00.000+01:00

I'm feeling pretty good today - I seem to achieved quite a lot without having worked very hard.

Woke up quite early but refused to get out of bed, i just lay there enjoying the comfort and watching bad tv - it's all cookery or kid's shows on saturday morning. I only got up when the cookery programme made me feel hungry.

Ran the usual Saturday errands, picked up the mail - the Marc Broussard album I'd been waiting for had arrived, haven't listened to it yet, I've added it to the pile of new music waiting for my attention - I've bought far too many albums from Itunes lately and haven't had time to listen to them all. I'm enjoying Donovan Frankenreiter's self-titled album at the moment.

Got my haircut - I'm usually the only one that knows when it needs cutting, with my hair as short as I keep it, nobody else thinks it's too long but I do. I usually get it cut every two weeks and I hated the fact that it was nearly three weeks this time.

I enjoy the process of getting my hair cut - it's time when all I can do is sit, relax and let it happen, normally i'm multi-tasking and never get to relax. Plus, I enjoy chatting with me hairdresser, is it still hairdressing when all she does is buzz it down to a number 2? Anyway, we chatted about nothing much - mostly about her really wanting her son to come skiing on my school trip, but it's expensive this close to christmas. Her son joined my school this year - it makes our relationship different than it used to be.

Spent most of the day marking work (for my american readers that's grading papers - if that sounds patronising I don't mean it to) I'm a bit sad that some of my boys aren't producing good work, they're capable but lazy - I need to "encourage" them somehow.

Trying to get all my jobs done today so that I don't have anything to do tomorrow and can relax before returning to work on Monday.

Finally, I've made a resolution - because I've a lot of support from other bloggers lately, I resolve to comment more on their blogs rather than just lurking - I need to get over my natural reticence and just do it.

EDIT - most of this post was written a couple of hours ago, but the latest update is - I've finished the school work, 801 student appointments scheduled and letters prepared for each one (thank god for mail merge), five sets of student work marked, interview prep sheets designed and produced, staff guidelines designed and produced, and the directed time budget calculated, produced and e-mailed to the boss. Now I can have Sunday to myself - apart from laundry but that really does itself.

I'm tired now but satisfied with jobs well done

see ya later

Another day of not working hard

2005-10-28T20:08:00.000+01:00

Today was the last proper day of the school holiday, just the weekend left before I go back to work.

The pile of marking that's been sat in the hall since last Friday, waiting for me to look at it is still there, untouched and undisturbed. I just don't want to do anything with it today.

I did do some of the prep for the forthcoming parents' meetings - after next week's prep time the next five weeks will be devoted to the parents of every student in the school coming to meet with a tutor, a different year group of students each week.

There's still a lot to do, not least of which is making sure that tutors have some assessment data to discuss with parents - I hope that subject teachers have completed the assessment tasks and are ready to input the data - they've got until next friday to do it and I haven't trained them how to do it yet!

The first week of parent appointments has been scheduled and sent out, but I've still got to do the rest - about 600 appointments stil to schedule.

I also need to get ready the prep sheets that each student needs to fill out before their meeting.

Once the meetings are underway I need to be available to see that everything runs smoothly - that means five straight weeks of solving everybody's problems.

Reminder to self - you enjoy being a manager!

One good thing today was that C came round for coffee and chat, I wasn't expecting her so it was really pleasant - as usual we gossiped about work, consoled each other about our respective workloads, and checked that we were each still sane.

I'm not sure of the validity of the sanity check - I'm not sure we'd notice if we each went nuts!

C has a new car at last, she's not that enthusiastic about it, but I guess that's the result of losing your car in an accident that you caused - i know that when I lost mine in an accident caused by someone else, I was desperate to get a new one and enjoyed the window shopping. Also C tends to be a bit more reserved about stuff like that.

I'm still enjoying blogging, but I think that when I'm back at work, the posts will get shorter and less frequent. They will also take on more of a negative slant cos I'll be letting off steam - the tough bit will be keeping names out of the mix.

It's been surprising (pleasantly so) how supportive of my blogging attempts, people I've never met can be. I've been made to feel really welcome by other bloggers and it gives be the push to keep going.

See ya later

Feeling pleased with myself

2005-10-27T17:12:00.000+01:00

Mike and Ryan both offered to help me with creating links in my blog, but my brain is built in such a way that I can't accept help until I've tried everything myself. I'm far too proud to ask for help myself, but I will help anybody else without hesitation.

Yes, I know I'm pig-headed and too independent, can't change after all these years.

But the guys' offer made me determined to work out the solution myself (whilst using the blogger knoweldge base too) This business of using strings of code seems a bit complicated, but it seems to have worked.

This just goes to prove that teachers can learn new things too.

My Homework Assignment from Adam

2005-10-27T13:39:00.000+01:00

When Adam set me the challenge to come up with the five songs that have most influenced my life, I thought that it would take some thinking about but would essentially be easy - boy was I wrong.

No matter what I've been doing today a little part of my brain has been mulling over my choices - I mean can a song that quite new to me (like anything of Blaine Larsen's, an artist I was put onto by Ryan's blog) still be said to have influenced my life more than something I've known and loved for years?

Anyway, I've picked songs that bring back memories from different parts of my life, so , in no particular order we have:

"Song Sung Blue" by Neil Diamond - I have memories of lying on my parents' bed when I was little and hearing this song, not sure if it was the radio or a record, but throughout my life there have been times when it's popped into my head and taken me back to that day on mum and dad's bed.

"You've lost that lovin' feeling" by the Righteous Brothers - when I was at College we used to have evenings when we would sit, drink and watch films, Top Gun was a film we watched many times - one of my friends wanted to be a fighter pilot so he would always choose that film. He wound up as a helicopter pilot in the airforce. Anyway, we used to sing this song in the student bar and then later when I'd left college and was working, I remember being in the pub with friends and the karaoke machine was brought out and of course, this is what we had to sing.

"The Imperial March" - Darth Vader's theme from Star Wars. When I'm at school I tend to be very serious and lacking in emotion and on one school ski trip that I lead, I had cause to go find one of the boys who was keeping the whole group waiting on the coach before we went on an excursion. I was obviously angry and as I walked down the bus to go find this lad, someone started to hum the Darth Vader tune and the whole bus joined in - since then the tune's been known as my theme tune and crops up on a regular basis, I even played it as I entered the school hall prior to addressing a room of 300+ students!

"Dancin' a catchy rhythm" - a Disney song - this brings back memories of being on a trip to the Disneyland resort in Paris for the last two Januarys, it's become a sort of theme song for the trip (yes, I like things to have themes). Again it was a school trip, but this time I don't lead I just help - there are usually four of us with forty boys, and this song gets sung in the lead up to the trip and lots of times while we're there, unfortunately it's just us adults that do the singing (and sometimes dancing) - the boys just look on sadly and shake their heads at us. I challenge any one to listen to it without joining in.

"Affirmation" - Savage Garden - this is the serious one, apart from the fact that I love Darren Hayes' music. I have a clearly defined sense of what I think is right and wrong and this is something that I try to live by - basically, we're all individual, and that we all have to find the set of rules that make us who we are, what works for me won't necessarily work for you etc. This song just seems to reinforce this idea for me.

This was tough assignment, choosing 5 songs was hard - I feel sad at what I've left out, at my advanced age of 412 (OK it's really 37) I've listened to and loved a lot of music, from opera to skater punk, from country to rock and everywhere in between.

To pick a few tracks even from just the 2000+ I've got on Itunes was hard, but I'm happy with the choice today - who knows what I'll think about it tomorrow.

Final thought - this assignment was fun and has meant I've spent my day remembering, and that's something I don't do enough - I'd almost forgotten the first time I met my niece and nephew, standing on a snow covered mountain on Christmas day, seeing my dad after his life saving operation, all of these things and many others came back to me today - many thanks Adam.

Shocked and Stunned

2005-10-27T12:41:00.000+01:00

I just stopped in on the off chance that someone might have actually left me a comment and what do I find but four comments - I feel so popular!

I didn't post yesterday 'cos I actually made it into school to catch up on my paperwork.

I will write more later today but Adam's given me a task to find the five songs that have most influenced my life and I'm going to need to think about that.

see ya later.

So much for good intentions

2005-10-25T18:36:00.000+01:00

When I went to bed last night I had a plan - I would get up early today, go get my mail and then either spend the day working on the small paperwork mountain in the lounge, or go to school and do the stuff I need to do there.

It was a good plan.

It was a plan doomed to failure.

I woke up on time but decided that the bed was just too comfortable, so I decided against getting the mail. Then after breakfast I decided to do some school prep here and then head into school for about lunchtime.

I did about half an hour's prep then spent the rest of the day watching TV, cleaning and building my Itunes library.

I must, I must, I must go to school tomorrow - there are things that only I can do and they must be done before Monday.

The only downside to going to school is the fact that the boss will be there and I just know that he'll either distract me so I don't get everything done, or he'll have other jobs for me to add to my list.

My blog got added to Ryan's and Mike's sites, thanks guys - I'd add them back if only I knew how. I need to learn how to do loads of stuff with this blog, links, pictures etc.

The link also gives me an incentive to keep writing, no point in being linked if there's nothing to read is there?

Three days of writing my blog - well done me!

More new toys

2005-10-24T14:21:00.001+01:00

Bought a new Ipod today - just the standard 20gb version, but I was getting fed up with having to pick and choose what to put on the Mini - I want to be able to have all of my music with me so that i can choose tunes to suit my mood.
Now I'm sitting here transferring all of my music into Itunes - about 6gb so far and loads more to go.

With the new mac mini as well, I've spent a lot of money this month, but I think I deserve it - I work damned hard.

Putting my CDs onto the mac means that I'm listening to stuff that i haven't heard in ages, there's been a lot of jumping about today, I've listened to the Carpenters (reminds me of being little and at home with mum and dad), now it's the Goo Goo Dolls' Dizzy up the Girl which reminds me of school ski trips - one of the lads lent me this album and i remember sitting in a very cold hotel bar listening to it. Coming up will be Nickelback which reminds me of skiing in Canada, Banff I think.

I'm loving doing this, I should have done it ages ago, I love music but only seem to listen to it in the car or occasionally in my office - I need to do it more.

"Bout time I used this thing

2005-10-23T22:25:00.000+01:00

Well, since I set up this blog, I've done absolutely nothing with it - I guess I should at least make one largeish post.
On holiday at the moment, a week out from school's always welcome. But unfortunately, I've got a stack of work to do and I will have to go into school for at least a day to catch up with some paperwork.
What with teaching, managing and being a general dogsbody, I never seem to have time to get everything done during the working day - I go in each day with set ideas for what I need to do and everyday those plans get forgotten.
It seems like people are always turning to me to solve their problems - does noone think for themselves? I don't remember hassling the senior staff this way when I was a classroom teacher.
Things aren't helped by a headteacher who's great at making sure that he gets his downtime but terrible at seeing when the rest of us need a break - I sometimes think that he gets his worklife balance right by delegating to me and one of the deputies - the other deputy and assistants don't seem to get the same amount of work as us.
I can feel myself getting really angry so, I'm gonna stop writing about work.
Been surfing the blogs again - i enjoy my little glimpses into the lives of other people, it puts my problems into some sort of perspective and makes me realise that we all have ups and downs and need the help of others at times.
I need to start commenting on those blogs more, rather than just lurking in the background. I also need to start writing this more.
I guess that I haven't added to this blog cos deep down I don't believe that my lif is of any interest to the wider world so why write it on a public forum.
Having said that, the act of writing down my thoughts has always had a calming effect - it's just that I used to handwrite them rather than publish them.
Who knows, maybe this will be the first post of many.

See ya world

First post ever

2005-05-08T18:13:00.000+01:00

After weeks and months of reading other people's blogs, I've just sat and created my own - the only problem is that I don't know if I will actually make use of it. Whilst i enjoy reading about other people's lives, I'm not sure that mine is worthy of writing about, but maybe I'll give it a try.